Hanna isn't sure that he believes that. He's fucked up so many times only to get back up again, but that was because-
"I did stop. I stopped trying for a while, actually. But the only thing that got me was nothing, and what good is it, being alive If you give nothing and get nothing?" If that was all he was doing, he should have just listened to her, stopped fighting to stay alive and let himself bleed out on that kitchen floor.
Pulling himself up to sit on the railing, tangling his legs between the bars so he doesn't fall, he can catch David's eyes easier, not at all shying away from his violent confessions. He works with vampires, the paranormal tends to give you some tolerance for violence even if he wasn't well equipped to handle it himself.
"Took alienating myself from anyone who could and would have helped me to come to that conclusion. A social murder suicide if you'll excuse the comparison, I know it doesn't quite match up. But I get it. I just got to the part where I needed to shoot myself and couldnt do it. All that came to mind was 'What a god damn waste.' But just cause I'm still here doesnt win me any fucking awards. Ive gotten people killed because I couldnt keep shit under control. I lost you Caleb, and this is the what, third time I've completely let down Conrad? Trying isn't good enough, and it never will be without some follow through that matters."
Cw: suicide mention
"I did stop. I stopped trying for a while, actually. But the only thing that got me was nothing, and what good is it, being alive If you give nothing and get nothing?" If that was all he was doing, he should have just listened to her, stopped fighting to stay alive and let himself bleed out on that kitchen floor.
Pulling himself up to sit on the railing, tangling his legs between the bars so he doesn't fall, he can catch David's eyes easier, not at all shying away from his violent confessions. He works with vampires, the paranormal tends to give you some tolerance for violence even if he wasn't well equipped to handle it himself.
"Took alienating myself from anyone who could and would have helped me to come to that conclusion. A social murder suicide if you'll excuse the comparison, I know it doesn't quite match up. But I get it. I just got to the part where I needed to shoot myself and couldnt do it. All that came to mind was 'What a god damn waste.' But just cause I'm still here doesnt win me any fucking awards. Ive gotten people killed because I couldnt keep shit under control. I lost you Caleb, and this is the what, third time I've completely let down Conrad? Trying isn't good enough, and it never will be without some follow through that matters."